As your child grows and spends more time out of your sight, you need to teach them to protect themselves. Child abuse and assault (both by strangers and by people known to the child) are very real dangers in all countries and every socio-economic group. It is important to discuss with your children (both boys and girls) the potential risks.
The intention isn't to terrify your child that people will want to take him/her away, rather it is to prepare a child in case of possible danger. Just explain that some people may want to harm him and so he needs to be careful.
Basic Safety Rules
Repeatedly tell your child not to accept sweets or gifts from strangers.
If approached by a stranger, he/she should not get close and not be afraid to shout to get people's attention.
If someone in a parked car calls the child to ask for instructions or to post a letter, he/she should not go near.
Encourage your child to tell you about anything that has made him/her uneasy and not to keep it a secret.
Explain the difference between a "good" secret (like planning a birthday party) and a "bad" secret that makes one feel guilty or scared. Tell your child that even if someone threatens to harm the child, he/she should tell you and you will take care of it.
Teach children to be cautious of people who offer them gifts, favours, or secrets in exchange for their silence or compliance.
Tell your child that he is never to go with a stranger even if the person claims to have been sent by you. If you ever had to send for him/her you would send someone familiar.
Explain "good" touches that a child feels happy about and "bad" touches that make him/her uncomfortable. Also, tell your child about body parts that other people should not touch - such as private parts. It is important that he/she says "NO" and tells you if he/she doesn't like someone's behaviour - even if it is someone well-known to the family. As a parent, you must take your child seriously if he/she complains.
To teach children to look out for suspicious behaviour, parents can:
Open communication: Create an open, non-judgmental space where children feel comfortable discussing their feelings and experiences.
Play a role: Use age-appropriate role-playing situations to help children practice responding to potentially dangerous situations.
Teach “forbidden” situations: Establish clear boundaries and situations in which children should immediately seek help from a trusted adult.
Trust your instincts: Encourage children to trust their instincts and feelings about people and situations.
Get to know safe people: Help children identify trusted adults, such as parents, teachers or family friends, who they can turn to for help.
From the security code: Set up family safety codes that kids can use when they feel unsafe or need help without raising suspicion.
Digital security: Educate children about online safety, including not sharing personal information or meeting strangers they meet online.
By teaching children to recognize suspicious behaviour, parents empower them to protect themselves and make informed decisions about their safety.
Review these instructions from time to time (not all at one time). You could turn it into a "what if" game. For example, "What would you do if a stranger comes to take you home from school?" or "What if a lady calls you to look at some sweet kittens?"
It is possible that your child may never face such a situation, but do remember, it's better to be safe than sorry.
If you would like to discuss this further or need some help or support in this or any other area, our counsellors would be happy to help.